So basically whats been happnin is i was up in MS for a week as a working student, with Mrs Evie. i learned a lot getting to ride many different horses. And totally falling in love with a new horse named Walkman, who used to be an advanced eventer, and falling in love with Armani all over again!! And now we are in kentucky for Pony Club Champs. We moved into the barns today and i'm team captain....
But so far i havent set the whole barn on fire so i think it will be okay.
However why i really wanted to write today is because its been a hard week. And i have to warn everyone...i've been holding in all my whining for about three weeks...sooo get ready. And if your of age and are bound and determined to read this, i promise it will read easier with some alcohol.
Basically i've just been in a crazy estrogen-fueled roller coaster ride that doesn't have any high parts. there are two options: right side up and low and upside down and low.
I've felt like i can't do anything right, and i'm just a failure as a rider. Everyone else seems to be moving so quickly... logically i know their probably moving about as fast as me, but it sure doesn't feel like it.
All of a sudden i can't for the life of me do a change of lead through trot. Don't ask me why, i have no idea.
On a personal note; just went through a breakup, and finished two classes during the summer that the teachers weren't prepared to teach. And i'm totally surprised i passed.
Friends are going through really tough times, and i have a tendency to try and fix everything because i cant stand to see the people i love hurt.
Now i'm stressing out about Champs, i told one of my moms friends that i respect a lot that i'm stressed about it and she told me i'm too young to be stressed out. Which made me feel incredibly ignored, and makes me feel like i'm not being taken seriously.
I just want to be taken seriously.
and i'm just tired...
and i don't know why...
physically i've done way more than this, brain wise i've done way more than this. But for some reason i'm just really tired. I really wish i could just take a week and not do a single thing except go for hacks in a field. Also i'm so totally not looking forward to going back to louisiana. i really hate it there. It is the bumfuck of the horse world, its hot and humid and muddy and bug infested and i don't like it.
So basically thats the end of my rant the pony club rulebook is done printing and now i have to go accomplish 1000 other jobs.
Cest la vie.